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Assessing Relationships* - Healthy Families …

Assessing Relationships*. Assessing Relationships What to observe What to ask What to listen for 9 How do you feel about yourself when you are 9 Does the mom allow physical proximity or lean 9 Comments related to a caregiver's childhood with your parents / boyfriend / spouse / friend? away from the person speaking? relationship. 9 What do you like best about spending time 9 Does the mom pay attention when others talk 9 Opinions or attitudes about the relationships with your parents / boyfriend / spouse / to her? Do others pay attention to her? that the caregivers see others having. friend?? 9 Does the mom mention relationships she has 9 Positive or negative descriptions of others or 9 How do you communicate with you parents / with others? how the caregivers relate to others.

Assessing Relationships* Assessing Relationships What to observe 9How do you feel about yourself when you are with your parents / boyfriend / spouse / friend? 9What do you like best about spending time with your parents / boyfriend / spouse /

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Transcription of Assessing Relationships* - Healthy Families …

1 Assessing Relationships*. Assessing Relationships What to observe What to ask What to listen for 9 How do you feel about yourself when you are 9 Does the mom allow physical proximity or lean 9 Comments related to a caregiver's childhood with your parents / boyfriend / spouse / friend? away from the person speaking? relationship. 9 What do you like best about spending time 9 Does the mom pay attention when others talk 9 Opinions or attitudes about the relationships with your parents / boyfriend / spouse / to her? Do others pay attention to her? that the caregivers see others having. friend?? 9 Does the mom mention relationships she has 9 Positive or negative descriptions of others or 9 How do you communicate with you parents / with others? how the caregivers relate to others.

2 Boyfriend / spouse / friend? Could you do 9 Does the mom describe relationships that 9 Comments about being angry or fearful of better? imply equal power or does she describe another person. 9 Does your opinion matter to your parents / relationships in which she is subordinate to 9 Hints of jealousy. boyfriend / spouse / friend? Does their someone else's wishes or needs? opinion matter to you? 9 Descriptions of extreme isolation or total 9 Does the mother appear to be afraid of the dependence on another for financial support. 9 Do you ever fight with your parents / boyfriend father? / spouse / friend? 9 A lack of relationships. Few experiences 9 Are there signs of physical abuse in the interacting with others. 9 If you fight, what does a fight look like? Does home? anyone get physically violent?

3 Do people hurt 9 A caregiver ignoring others involved in the 9 Does the mother or father act jealous of the conversation or being ignored. Talking over each other with words? Do you punish each attention you pay to the children or another other by not talking or by withholding attention each other. member of the house? from each other? 9 How does the couple talk about each other, in 9 If you fight, does someone win the argument positive or negative terms? How do they talk or do you compromise? about their children? 9 Do your parents/ boyfriend / spouse / friend 9 Is the mother responsive to her children when encourage you or put you down? Do they they cry or demand attention? think your hobbies/career/activities are important? 9 Does the mother trust others or does she * For more information, refer back to the job seem wary?

4 Aids from the Domestic Violence module. December 2006 1. Job Aid 2: Relationship Traits Healthy Unhealthy Priority: The relationship is important to both people. Isolation: One person in the relationship demands exclusivity and tries to cut the other person off from friends and family, which makes the person feel alone or shut out emotionally. Clarity: Boundaries are in place to protect all involved. Dependence: One member of the relationship has to completely rely on the other for financial and emotional well-being. Honesty: Communication is open and truthful. Distrust: Neither person trusts the other one enough to share feelings or thoughts honestly. Responsibility: Each person is committed to the well-being of the other Jealousy: One person is overly possessive of the other.

5 The other is person. fearful because of the possessive or suspicious behavior. Respect: The each person's opinions are treated as valid. Violence: Fights are physically or emotionally violent. One person considers yelling and hitting acceptable ways of solving an argument. Equality: Both members of a relationship are considerate of the other. Inequality: One partner cannot possibly meet the other's expectations. One is not better than another. Treatment just isn't fair. December 2006 2.


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