Sex, God & Marriage - NTSLibrary

1 THE BRUDERHOF FOUNDATION, , God &MarriageJOHANN CHRISTOPH ARNOLDP lease share this e-book with your friends. Feel free to e-mail it or print it in its entirety or in part, but please do not alter it in any way. If you wish to make multiple copies for wider distribution, or to reprint portions in a newsletter or periodical, please observe the following restrictions: You may not reproduce any material from for commercial gain You must include this credit line: Reprinted from Copyright 2002 by The Bruderhof Foundation, Inc.

2 Used with permission. This e-book is a publication of The Bruderhof Foundation, Inc., Farmington, PA 15437 USA and the Bruderhof Communities in the UK, Robertsbridge, East Sussex, TN32 5DR, UKCopyright 2002 by The Bruderhof Foundation. , PA 15437 USAAll Rights ReservedPREFACEFive years ago we published the first edition of Sex, God, and Marriage . Since then readers have responded to it as to no other Plough title. It seems the book has touched a tender nerve. Some find its message out of sync with reality. Others say it unsettles them more than they would like to admit.

3 The vast majority have written to say how grateful they are for the clear yet compassionate guidance it the past is any indication, Sex, God, and Marriage will continue to prompt many more responses and spark new discussion. Granted, it is a book whose message few in our present age care to hear. But for those who listen, it holds a promise. A reader recently wrote to us to say, All my past relationships failed because they were built on sex, not God. Sex, God, and Marriage has given me insight into how a true relationship and Marriage should be.

4 May it do the same for many EditorsApril 2002To my faithful wife, Verena,without whose helpthis book would not have been Sex, God, and Marriage we find a message needed today in every part of the world. To be pure, to remain pure, can only come at a price, the price of knowing God and of loving him enough to do his will. He will always give us the strength we need to keep purity as something beautiful for God. Purity is the fruit of prayer. If families pray together they will remain in unity and purity, and love each other as God loves each one of them.

5 A pure heart is the carrier of God s love, and where there is love, there is unity, joy, and Teresa of CalcuttaNovember 1995 Sex, God & Marriage ForewordviSex, God & Marriage The the Image of Is Not Good forMan to Be Two Shall Become One First the Image of and the Sensuous Pure in God Has Joined in the Holy Mystery of Sacredness of , God & Marriage ContentsParenthood and the Gift of Purity of Those Considering Service of Spirit of Our or Without Even to Mention?..157 The Hidden about Divorce and Remarriage?

6 183 Therefore Let Us Keep a , God & Marriage IntroductionINTRODUCTIONE verywhere today, people are searching for lasting and meaningful relationships. The myth of romance continues to be taken for granted by millions, and a new generation of young men and women has accepted the belief that sexual freedom is the key to fulfillment. But as desperately as people want to believe in the sexual revolution of the last few decades, it is clear to many of them that something has gone terribly wrong. Instead of bringing freedom, the sexual revolution has left countless wounded and isolated souls.

7 As we face the great anguish around us, it is more important than ever for all of us, young and old, to consider the direction of our lives and ask ourselves where we are twenty-first century heralds the loss of the clear teachings of the Old and New Testaments on Marriage and the relationship of the sexes. We have turned against God and rebelled against his order of creation, and we have justified our rebellion with human arguments. We have ignored the words of Jesus and scorned the voice of the Spirit.

8 But we have found neither freedom nor , God & Marriage IntroductionAs a pastor I have counseled many people over the years, both single and married. For many of them, the sexual sphere is not an area of joy but one of frustration, confusion, and even despair. People look for unity of heart and soul with one another, but they are so blinded by the notion of romantic love that their deepest longings remain obscured. They know that Marriage and sexual union is a gift from God; that it should be the most intimate and rewarding relationship a man and a woman can share.

9 But they wonder why it has become the source of such loneliness and pain for them and for so many am no social scientist. But if the findings of recent studies have made anything clear it is this: the fallout caused by our culture s acceptance of casual sex is socially devastating. More than half of all marriages in the United States fail. Almost forty percent of America s children live in different houses than their biological fathers. Poverty, violent crime, delinquency, promiscuity, alcohol and drug abuse, mental illness, and suicide are all rooted in the breakdown of the family and the erosion of the Marriage the same time, those who save sexual activity until Marriage (though their numbers are dwindling)

10 Are far less likely to have an affair or divorce, and those who commit themselves to one lifelong partner lead happier , God & Marriage IntroductionWhile current trends point to continuing decay, there are encouraging signs that people are beginning to call into question the thrills of cheap sex and the seeming ease of uncommitted love. This is especially true among GenXers. There is an increased yearning among young people to find genuine relationships and to build secure homes, giving renewed hope that a two-parent family is still and again I have seen that when people are willing to surrender their lives to Jesus, they are able to find a way out of their unhappiness.