ED 375 759 HE 027 858 AUTHOR Turner, Colin; Andrews ...

1 ED 375 759 AUTHORTITLEINSTITUTIONREPORT NOPUB DATENOTEAVAILABLE FROMPUB TYPEEDRS PRICEDESCRIPTORSDOCUMENT RESUMEHE 027 858 Turner, Colin; Andrews , PhilippaOne to One: Interpersonal Skills for Coll., Bristol (England). College, Coombe Lodge, Blagdon, Bristol, BS186RG, England, United Kingdom ( Britishpounds).Books (010)GuidesNon-Classroom Use (055)MF01/PC05 Plus Effectiveness; Administrator Guides;Administrator Role; *Administrators; *CollegeAdministration; Colleges; Communication Skills;Foreign Countries; Higher Education; *InterpersonalCompetence; Job Skills; Listening Skills;Transactional AnalysisIDENTIFIERSG estalt Psychology; Neurolinguistic ProgrammingABSTRACTThis book explores interpersonal skills for collegeadministrators through analysis of fictional, but typical, scenes anddialogues set at a fictional "Elmdale College".

2 The analysis anddiscussion use transactional analysis, gestalt psychology, andneuro-linguistic programming theories to help the reader understandthe underlying processes that take place in different types ofencounters between people. Individual chapters discuss the followingskills:(1) establishing good contact and creating rapport;(2)activE, listening;(3)locating ownership of problems;(4) assertivebehavior and dealing with requests and refusals;(5) using languagewell;(6) coping with criticism;(7) exploring personal issues;(8)staying with reality;(9) giving and receiving feedback;(10)interviewing the marginal performer; and (11) examining the role ofpersonal beliefs in a skills-based approach. Appendixes listcharacters that appear in the scenes, chart the organizationalstructure of Elmdale College, and offer brief notes on transactionalanalysis, neuro-linguistic programming, and gestalt an index.

3 An annotated bibliography contains 17 recommendedreadings.(JB)**Reproductions supplied by EDRS are the best that can be made*from the original document.**ClIBEST COPY AVAILABLE2U S DEPARTMENTOF EDUCATIONO ffice of EeticeponaiResearch and improvementEDUCATIONALRESOURCESINFORMATI ONCENTER (ERIC)p' This documenthas beenreproduced asreceived from theperson ororganizationoriginating ito Minor changeshave been madetoimprove reproductionqualityPoints of view oropinions stated inthisdocument do notnecessarily representofficial 0E111 positionor policy'PERMISSION TO REPRODUCETHISMATERIAL HAS BEEN GRANTEDBYThe Staff CollegeTO THE EDUCATIONALRESOURCESINFORMATION CENTER (ERIC)"/ONE TO ONEINTERPERSONAL SKILLS FOR MANAGERSByColin TurnerandPhilippa AndrewsPublished by The Staff College3Q EsThe views expressed in this book are those of the authors.

4 They should notbe taken to represent the views of The Staff 0 907659 82 9 The Staff College 1994 All rights are reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, storedin a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, , chemical, optical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, withoutthe prior permission of the copyright reference to any existing institutions or real persons, living or dead, by The Staff CollegeCoombe LodgeBlagdonBristol, BS18 6 RGTel (0761) 462503 Fax (0761) 463140 Typesetting by Avonset, Midsomer NortonPrinted in the UK by Booksprint, BristolCover films by Triangle, YattonLayout and sub-editing by Pippa Toogood, The Staff CollegeCartoons and cover design by Susan Leather, The Staff College4 CONTENTSP reface5 Introduction7 Chapter 1 Making contact11 Chapter 2 Active listening21 Chapter 3 Whose problem is it anyway?

5 29 Chapter 4 Requests and refusals39 Chapter 5 Cleaning up language49 Chapter 6 Coping with criticism57 Chapter 7 Exploring personal issues65 Chapter 8 Staying with reality77 Chapter 9 Giving and receiving feedback87 Chapter 10 Interviewing the marginal performer97 Chapter 11 Beliefs: bondage or liberation?107 Further reading113 Appendix 1 The characters117 Appendix 2 The college organisation119 Appendix 3 A note on transactional analysis,neuro-linguistic programming and gestalt 121 Index126 PREFACEWe decided to replace the publication Developing interpersonal skills(Turner 1983) as it was getting out of date. However, as the need for betterinterpersonal skills among college managers has never been greater than inthe present period of change, we have expanded from the original one bookto the following three so as to incorporate much new first book, Transactional analysis in management (Hewson andTurner 1992) replaces and adds to the first three chapters of the book.

6 One to one, deals with interaction skills between individualsor very small groups. It replaces and adds to chapters5 to 9 in the further publication, expected to be published in 1994, will be concernedwith group and team behaviour, and will replace and add to chapters 10 to12 in the original three books are set in the context of an imaginary college, and the skillswhich are described and analysed are drawn from practical examples of this book each of the main chapters has been written jointly by the twoauthors. For those readers who need it, Appendix 1 lists the charactersmentioned in the dialogue. They are of course fictional, and neither thecollege nor the staff make any reference to any real person or college. Wehave also added a brief note on the organisational structurethe college forthose who like to have that context (Appendix 2).

7 ABOUT THE AUTHORSP hilippa Andrews trained as a teacher, but on graduating as a BEd, wentinto journalism and after working on a provincial paper becamepublicationseditor at the Further Education Staff College (as The Staff College was thenknown). She left there on starting a family and has since worked as a freelanceeditor from her home in Bath in between bringing up her two children. Shehas completed first level training in transactional analysis and group Turner worked in schools and higher education and then at theFurther Education Staff College where he introduced the first interpersonalskills programmes which he subsequently deve;:.-_,ped over the next 20 has been trained at various levels in transactional analysis, co-counsellingand neuro-linguistic programming. He lives in Wells in our understanding of interpersonal skills has come from manysources over the years, we would particularly like to acknowledge our debt inour own learning of transactional analysis (TA) to Julie Hewson and MaryCox, and of neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) to John Seymour.

8 Themodel of marginal performance interviewing used in Chapter 10 wasintroduced to Staff College programmes by Russ Curtis, a senior managerfrom the British Columbia Institute of Technology, and is adapted with littlechange here. The lists of metaphors and predicates on pages 16 and 17 weadapted from John Seymour's workshop papers and are reproduced herewith his permission. Susan Leather designed the cover and the cartoons, andPippa Toogood was responsible for layout and sub-editing and managing theproject through its stases from first discussions to published book. Susan andPippa took great interest in our work, gave us support and encouragement,and raised many queries and suggestions which improved the final text6 INTRODUCTIONE lmdale College is a medium-sized college situated ina pleasant part ofa city of 200,000 people.

9 It lies about three-quarters of a mile from the centrein an area built up at the turn of the century, and for a spell in the 1930s, whennew estates were springing up on the outskirts of the city,it becameunfashionable and a little down at heel. However,over the past 30 years ithas become one of the more desirable areas, and althoughmany of the largerhouses have been converted into flats, it hasa very settled college is in one of several broad, treelinedavenues full of large late-Victorian villas. It has two major sites at either end ofa long site, the old further education college, consists mostly ofa large fourstorey block built in 1964, and though the size and theexpanse of glass israther obtrusive in this area, it is for its stylea sound and not unpleasantbuilding. The grounds, which include lawns and silver birchtrees besides theconcrete drives and parking areas, are well cared for, though the effectissomewhat spoilt by the ubiquitous scattering of 20-year-oldtemporary the rear of the premises the ground gently dropsto a valley with astream and small lake, all now encompassed by a municipal park.

10 Nearto thissite is the old redbrick university and an up-market retailarea with plenty ofsmall shops, offices and refreshment outlets. This site is officiallyknown the other end of the road is the formergrammar school, a mostly one-storeyed building generously spread round twoor three playgrounds. It wasbuilt in the 1920s, but when it was reconstitutedas a sixth form college in1975, it was totally refitted and a new library and administrative blockwereadded At the same time, one wing of the old school witha separate streetentrance was turned into an adult education institute, which also acquiredtwolarge villas in a street College was created two yearsago by a merger of the FE collegewith the sixth form college and adult education institute (AEI).It has had tocope with a sharp decline of traditional industry in the city, most marked inmachine tool and car component factories, but has benefited froma dramaticincrease in office employment, particularly from relocated firms, anda steadyincrease in service industries and the caring professions.